Muli

Muli (Vina Morales)

Kung magkikita tayong muli
Hayaan mong di kita ibubuko
Sino mang kasama mo
Kung magkikita tayong muli
Tuloy ka lang
Kahit ba mautak siya
Di na niya malalaman
Minahal mo ako noon
May pangakong kailanman
At minahal rin kita noon
Ngunit iyong napabayaan
At ngayong tapos na tayo
Ang iyong sinasabi
Kaya't huwag kang mangangamba
Di na ako aasa
Magkita man tayong muli

Kung magkikita tayong muli
Relaks ka lang
Madali akong kausap
Hindi ako mapaghanap
Kung magkikita tayong muli
Hayaan mo
Di kita ibubuko
Sino mang kasama mo
Minahal mo ako noon
May pangakong kailanman
At minahal rin kita noon
Ngunit iyong napabayaan
At ngayong tapos na tayo
Ang iyong sinasabi
Kaya't huwag kang mangangamba
Di na ako aasa
Magkita man tayong muli

Kung magkikita tayong muli
Paano ka
Di na malaya ang puso mo
Di ka na nag-iisa
Kung magkikita tayong muli
Ayoko na
Kaya't huwag kang mangangamba
Di na ako aasa
Magkita man tayong muli

--

I was staring blankly over the glass window. Heavy rain started to fall; it mirrored her feelings right now. Loneliness engulfed her especially at times like this.

I sat in silence, trying to forget the reason behind my misery. Facing people in my daily life, gave them my best smile. Spreads happiness, I jump, clap, and laugh out loud. But truly, my heart is bleeding.

People who are close to me knew and offered sympathy and help but were refused. Pushed them away by saying I was great. “Never been better” my exact words while flashing my signature smile.

I sighed and turned the television on and saw him, dazzling; his eyes were dancing as he answered questions. “He looked happy without me.” I said with clouded eyes as I watched his every move, every twitch of facial muscle and every smile he gave to everyone “That used to be my smile” I thought as memories flashed like a movie scene in front of me

“His eyes look different” one of the MC commented on how Hyun Joong looked at her after she put on the first wedding gown they picked

She looked at him beside her that very moment and she saw him blush. “This kid, he wouldn’t” she convinced herself “I’m just a noona to him. He wouldn’t dare. He has such a great career in front of him now” she thought to herself while she assessed him using her peripheral vision

It was the first time she saw that smile; it was different from those random smile he gave to everyone. She felt it was special, a smile just for her.

And indeed it was, when he told her he meant every word he sang for her as a present for her birthday. That smile was engraved permanently in her heart but she resisted. She remained calm told him he was just confused and that once their fake marriage would end, he’ll change his mind eventually.

But the kid persisted, until her resolves were broken. It started with dates she can’t turn down. In the end turned out into a serious relationship.

After their farewell, she knew she can’t live without him. She felt how her heart ripped into pieces faking a farewell. So without her intending to cry that time, tears flowed uncontrollably.

WGM was a leeway for her and Hyun Joong to meet in public but it was gone. He became very busy with his schedules, he was so popular that people requested for his appearance.

The drama took all of his time. Yes he called her, texted her and even went to his house a couple of times but to her dismay, he was too exhausted to even lift a finger. It was though he went to her house to sleep. And be fed accordingly. At first it was okay. She understood the situation perfectly well but in the long run she grew tired of waiting. Grew tired from cancelled dates, from promises that he broke, and his cute banter about her sexy dresses which sent her heart shivers became annoying.

The last straw was at the awards night. Repeatedly she had called him, requiring his presence but she was always set aside. The least priority, the last on his list. She felt a pang of self pity. She had been waiting for him but he was not coming.

She remembered the last call

“Shillang, I’ve been calling you for days now. When are you coming over?” she said

“Mianhe! Let me check my schedule.” He answered. She heard him asking his manager hyung for his schedule.

“You’re free tomorrow at dinner.” His manager answered after scanning

“I’ll be there for dinner.” He said and in a hushed tone he said “Buin”

She felt like a kept woman but she answered cheerfully “Assa!! I’ll cook you dinner then. I’ll wait for you! Take care! I love you!”

“Uh. Bye. See you!” he replied and ended the call

She felt bad with the reply but she brushed it off. “I’m a good girlfriend” she told herself and tried to beam

The next day she took out the possible party dresses she needed to consult before wearing. Then busied herself in making a delicious and nutritious dinner for her beloved shillang. She sang songs while doing it, waiting excitedly until the clock ticked to 7 pm…. 7:30… 8:00

“He’s late.” she said as she looedk at her wrist watch. Her stomach started grumbling for food. She took her phone and tried to contact him but she heard a busy tone.

She drank water to lessen her hunger and started to pace. 8:30…. She sat down on her sofa watching at the television blankly.

Frustration and anger started to rise with hunger. She looked at the dining table fully set. The bottle of Champaign on a bucket previously full of ice was now surrounded with water.

9:00 pm her phone rang she knew who her caller was but she opted to ignore it. Then again it rang the second time. She answered it in a weak voice. “Yes?”

“Mianhe, I can’t be with you tonight. There was a change in shooting schedule. I’m sorry I’ve called you late.”

She cleared her throat before she spoke “Okay. Do what you need to do. I’ll have my dinner then.”

“Okay. Enjoy your dinner. Bye!” he ended the call

She sat there in silence. She never felt so lonely in her life. Not even after she broke up with her long time boyfriend. A soft sob escaped her throat. She cried her heart out the whole night. And she woke up with a heavy heart.

They broke up at the awards night. She changed her number and avoided him at all cost.

Now looking at the television he smiled at a girl beside him while looking directly into her eyes. “That smile was mine” she thought again a bitter smile on her face “But now it’s yours” she looked at the girl on screen now. Blushing as she battled Hyun Joong’s stare.

There have been rumors that they are dating, Park Shin Hye and him after the CF. And by the looks of it, she knew there is something going on between them. “I knew that look.” She smiled bitterly again

“They look good together.” she assessed both of them on screen. “And she has the liberty to call him oppa.” She chuckled, amused.

“I’m letting go.” She convinced herself. “I won’t interfere.”

“If ever we’ll bump each other in the future I’ll pretend. I have two faces. I’m strong. She won’t even know we were once a couple.” She let out one last drop of tear before she changed the channel