Invisible Line

Who says all is fair in love? You fell first, you shoulder the burden. It should be easy after all she knows him real well. She knows his weaknesses and strengths but how come she had not scored a bit since planning stage?

--

Months after they were virtually married she can say he knew him well. His perks, quirkiness, likes and dislikes. She has been attentive when it comes to him, she knew his schedules well and monitors it every time she gets. She has admitted long ago to herself and to her unnies that she likes him. And she is doing a good job concealing her feelings, just like her unnies suggested, at least until the right time comes.

But when is the right time? She has been asking herself that same question as she lay down on her bed to sleep. Hyoyeon said to wait for signs that he likes her back, it has been months but he has been the same. He has been taking care of her on-screen as his wife but when the cameras are out, she’s back to dongsaeng status, his new found best friend, that’s what she called her. And being one, she has the liberty to know what and who interests him. Hearing those from him, she felt her heart was crushed by an elephant, stomped to pieces but she have to endure it, putting a smile on her face as he animatedly talks about his crush. What made her sane is the fact that he can’t date anyone, not until he was virtually married to her.

--

It’s late at night, they just arrived from their aquarium date and their recording was about to end, Yonghwa started hovering around her while she was busy making an apple milk shake. “I heard you’re having fun going to school, you even shook hands with male students” he pried, he has been meaning to ask her that since this morning but he was too busy covering up his fear of goldfish to ask, he doesn’t want to look foolish in front of her and their fans.

She shook her head, she knew this was coming, to Yongseo fans, this might be shown as his jealous streak and how she wished it’s because of that but the truth is, he is just an over protective oppa “They’re fans oppa. You even hugged one. You told me I can do that once in a while, right?” she chuckled. They have been really close and called each other in and out of filming.

He gave her a contented smirk “You’re right. It’s good that you listen to your nampyeon.” he pats her shoulder and sat on their sofa. Seohyun sat beside him and they talked about how great their day was.

That ended their shoot. As the crews and their manager are busy packing up, they went out to their Avatar inspired balcony. With Yonghwa’s hands on his pocket and hers crossed across her chest, they stood there in a comfortable silence. The night breeze toyed with their hair, she heard him inhaled deeply, filling his lungs with fresh air, his eyes closed. “I heard Jinwoon is courting you” he broke the silence

Her heart beat faster as she stared at his handsome profile “Oppa, why are you so protective of me?” she said without answering his question “That it seemed like your jealous” she wanted to add but kept it to herself. It was the question she has been meaning to ask but is too shy to do so.

He opened his eyes and looked at her endearingly “Because you’re my friend. I want the best for you. I want you to be happy” he took the hair that is covering her face due to the wind and tacked it behind her ear

Seohyun sighed when he did that, “What kind of girl can resist not falling in love with this guy?” She thought “Do you know what’s good for me and what can make me happy?” the question came deep within her heart. She felt like crying. If only he knew.

“I’ll know it when it comes” he shrugged and wrapped his arm around her shoulder

“You won’t” she answered “You don’t even know how good it feels to be this close to you” she thought, tempted to lean her head on his shoulder

“Don’t be so sure” he said confidently a smirk on his lips

“But I’m sure” she retorted, her voice louder than a whisper

He faced her and touched her chin “Then tell me. I’ll find it anywhere for you. I want to make you happy”

“Then make me” she wanted to regret what she just said but when he replied she realized he did not get what she really meant

He snapped his fingers in front of her face and said “Okay, give me a list of everything you want in a guy.”

“Aigoo..” she was prepared to confess her feelings. How could someone as worldly as him be so clueless?

“What?” he nudges her “Just not Superman, he’s taken”

She let a fake laugh but obliged “I want someone with a good sense of humor”

“It’s good” he nodded, started counting with his little finger “What else?”

“Responsible and sensitive of my needs and is easy to be with. I want someone who doesn’t burden me, appreciate my talents, loyal and faithful” she enumerated

“It seems like I’m the one you’re looking for.” He was obviously joking but she felt herself blush

“I said loyal and faithful” she whined

“I’m loyal.” He cocked his head

“Faithful?” She was talking about his crushes, there are many of them, but is it considered being unfaithful? She wondered

“I just haven’t met a girl that can make me faithful” he said putting up an aegyo

She pouted “And of course, I want him to have a good personality. He doesn’t have to be princely handsome, but good looking enough for me to not be scared when I wake up in the morning with him by my side” she joked. Yonghwa is handsome and hot, no doubt about that, but in the industry that they’re in, she saw idols more handsome and buff than him, but even with that, they don’t interest her.

“That’s me alright!” he answered sheepishly

“Thick skinned!” she hit his shoulder lightly and crossed her arms across her chest while looking away, trying to hide her flushed face “I want someone who can keep promises” she heard him clear his throat, his thumb pointed at him “Humble” she said her right brow slightly raised

“You know I only brag when it’s true. And you know it” he retorted

“You’re like selling yourself to me” she whined at him “you don’t have to” her heart answered

He sighed “Hyun, the reason behind why you can’t find a boyfriend is because you are looking for someone like me but I’m the only one in this world. It seems like you’ll end up becoming a spinster!” he joked

“I am not looking for someone like you!” she whined “How clueless can you get?” she thought her patience getting thin

“I thought you’re type is someone nerdy, not those nerdy looking guys but those intelligent guys” he said, he stopped joking when he sensed Hyun’s temper

“That’s what you thought” she smiled “That’s what you get for being highly opinionated; you feel that you knew all about me”

“Why? Is there something I don’t know?!” he grabbed her shoulders and stared at her in disbelief

“Of course! You don’t know a lot” she answered

“You want to share?” he asked with those puppy eyes “What are those?”

She looked down and she saw her manager oppa and his manager hyung sitting on the garden set waiting for them. Both have become close friends because of them. “It’s getting late, oppa. We should go. Our managers are waiting for us”

His eyes grew big as he heard what she said “You’re keeping a secret from me?!” he looked surprised

She shrugged “All people have secrets”

“I don’t have secrets now that you don’t know!” he said. He trusted her completely; he told her his secrets from being mischievous in school to the number of girlfriends, his first kiss and his crushes.

“Well a girl is always entitled to keep a secret or two” she squared her shoulders

“But not from me. I’m your best friend. You can hide secrets from your parents but not to me.” he whined

“Oppa! You might be my only best guy friend but definitely not my only best friend. I have 8 best friends oppa. And where did you get that reason?” she asked slightly amused of how ridiculous his reason is. So far she has no secrets that her mom doesn’t know.

“Don’t change the subject. I want to know.” He insisted

“I can’t tell you. It will complicate things” she answered back

“In what way?” he asked confused

“I just can’t. I’m sorry.” She looked down. He held her chin and looked straight to her eyes. He just looked at her as if trying to read her mind. She had to look away lest her eyes revealed everything.

Then he sighed “Maybe I should leave.” He said, took his hand from her chin.

It just occurred to her that they have been standing there for a while now. They were so close they could be lovers.

She walked with him to the door when she heard him say “Maybe I don’t really have to know. It’s probably better this way.”

He was long gone, and now she is sitting inside SNSD’s van thinking deeply to herself. Does he know? Was it just her imagination that he read what was in her mind?

“Hey!” Hyoyeon said “What happened?” she asked. Seohyun looked around. She in her room but it seems unclear how she got there. “You just went inside our dorm and went straight here like a zombie. What happened?” she asked again

“I think he knew and he doesn’t like it” she said in whisper, keeping her tears from falling

“What do you mean?” Hyo asked her voice slightly alarmed

She told her what happened “He was in his playful self earlier but all of a sudden he left. It only means one thing. He read my mind. It’s possible; it explains those instances where he knows what I want without even telling him or vice versa. He can guess it. Maybe that’s what happened earlier and he doesn’t like it” she finished, her voice slightly trembled with emotions that were kept inside “It only means he don’t have feelings for me. He just sees me as his friend. He wants it to remain that way. Maybe I just have to leave him alone.” She continued

“But you love him. He couldn’t find any other woman like you” Hyo stroked her hair, she can feel her pain “You can’t give up. Just like that.” she continued

“No, I should. I can and I will” she convinced herself “But how?” she thought

--

It has been two days after that incident, two days of not talking to each other on the phone. And their first encounter after that.

Backstage, before rehearsals for Inkigayo, Yonghwa stormed inside SNSD’s waiting room. The busy and noisy room became silent as they saw him. His eyes searched and landed on Seohyun who was seated in front of a mirror, a stylist donning her hair. Their eyes met on the mirror. He put his hands on her shoulder and guided her to stand up and face him, not caring of the curious and excited glances from all people inside the room.

“Hyun” he started, his eyes looked at her lovingly “I purposely did not contact you after that night, I wanted to think clearly.” He sighed before he continued “The other night, I was so confused and afraid because of the look on your face. I had to leave. I had to run. But I realized I have been running away for too long. I was in denial for so long, but the truth caught up with me. That night was a revelation; I don’t want to accept it that’s why I ran away. I got drunk but after I woke up, the truth still remained and I don’t know how to confess my feeling for you.”

Upon hearing those she felt her heart is going to explode. It could hardly contain all the joy and happiness his confession caused

“You see, I don’t want to think that I love you, coz I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to change our friendship. Maybe subconsciously, I told myself to not court you, that you are off limits because if I’ll do that, I’ll lose you.” He continued

Her eyes were misty but her lips are hanging on her ears.

“Just imagine how I felt when I thought you don’t love me. Do you have any idea how difficult it was? So I hope you understand that I denied my feelings even to myself” he said now smiling

“Rest assured that I understand. Because of your denial, I thought you can’t really love me. Imagine the misery.” She pouted at him

He smiled “Sorry, but it’s all over now. We’re still friends, but we’re definitely lovers, and let’s keep it that way”

“I have been dreaming of this moment for months” she sighed and looked around. It’s the first time she noticed all her unnies, their stylists and their manager oppas looking at them, like they’re watching their favorite kdrama, big smile adorned each faces. “Well not exactly this. I dreamed this moment to be just the two of us”

She heard them chuckled, someone started the chant which was joined by others “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

They laughed, he kissed her forehead and hugged each other tightly. “It feels good” Seohyun said in a whisper that only Yonghwa can hear.

Yonghwa smiled and kissed the top of her hair “Yes it does. Now I can tell you how I feel honestly”

“Now I can tell how good looking you are and takes care of you without fearing you might be able to read between the lines.” She answered

“Because we’ve crossed the line, that friendship line and the line that keep us between reel and real” Yonghwa added

They heard squeals and aws. Their audiences are having the time of their life watching them but they don’t care, they’re too happy to care.